I have been in more ‘situationships’ than relationships. I’m pretty sure my ancestors’ remains are rolling in shame in their graves as I boldly confess this. “Who was the trailblazer of such crap anyway?” I want to assume that you know what a ‘situatioship’ is. If you have no idea, a ‘situationship’ is that situation where you are in a relationship that’s not a relationship; When you can’t quite describe your relationship with someone. My man who’s not my man, ‘kinda’ situation. They act like they are into you but they never say it nor make it clear, ‘kinda’ situation. You want to get excited about all the feelings but oh wait, “what exactly are we?” ‘kinda’ situation and many more.
If you’ve ever been in a situationship, you’ll agree with me that when you board that ‘situationship bus’ you always hope that it has a destination. You hope that whatever it is you two have will eventually become something. You hope that he or she will eventually label whatever it is you have. You do a lot of hoping. Every now and then you feel the urge to ask the question, “what are we?” It is very important to define a relationship in order to avoid unnecessary confusion. Defining your relationships helps you set necessary limits.
Truth is, today people hide their feelings behind friendships; calling each other BFF’s yet one of them is clinging to emotions that will never be reciprocated at any point. Allowing yourself to be used with hope that someday the other will want to commit. The next thing you know, your heart is broken and you can’t share your predicament with anybody because deep down you know the fault is yours. You end up being bitter with people who had no idea you had feelings for them because as far as they are concerned, you are ‘just a friend’.
Relationships have become complicated. Honestly, I feel like they shouldn’t be. If only we were more transparent and intentional with our relationships, they wouldn’t be complicated. Nowadays, most guys ‘kinda’ hit on a girl and leaves her to guess the authenticity of his vibe. It’s hard to connect his words to his actions, so she has to perform her voodoo and figure that out for herself. Her voodoo assures her that he’s into her, only for her to figure out that she is just ‘Becky with the good hair’. I don’t know if some of you fancy such mind games, but I refuse to be part of such atrocity. What if we make our intentions clear there and then? No hide and seek, you just drop your vibe like it’s hot.
So, good riddance to situationships. It’s high time we did away with the fear to commit and the fear of being broken. And one way of doing that is by clearly defining our relationships from the beginning. It’s okay to say goodbye to people who are not clear about their intentions. Guard your heart and help others guard theirs. You don’t want to be the hurt person who ends up hurting people.